I've mentioned in my notes before how I'm the only woman in a department of men. Fact is, in my building there are only 7 women and a little more than 100 men. Some optimists may think those are incredible odds for a woman looking to get a little lucky.
Not.
I'll be the first to admit there are some lookers (well, maybe 4 or 5) and I do my share of flirting but the majority are funk-E and/or neurotic. Let me share an example of each demonstrated to me just today.
The first example is that of funk-E. This guy comes in my office today and wants to ask me a few questions about some work I do. He pulls up a chair beside mine so that I can show him some examples and suddenly I feel that he is much too close and within my personal comfort zone. I take a deep breath and decide to tough it out. It's close to lunch time and he shouldn't be around very long.
As I'm explaining a process he starts to dig in his ear. I'm used to these men burping and making odd noises with their bodies so this digging didn't really take too much of my attention.....UNTIL he took whatever it was he was digging for and flicked it on my floor. I just looked at him. No, I'm pretty sure I was looking thru him. He just kept on talking as if nothing out of the ordinary had just happened.
It's one thing to do that in the privacy of your own office but to do that in front of someone else, and to flick the evidence on the floor is funk-E.
The second example happened this afternoon when the most neurotic person I know came to my office. He too pulled up a chair right beside me, invading my comfort zone. The difference with this man and the other is this guy smells really nice and dresses really sharp. However, scent and fashion cannot help those that suffer from this disorder.
He asked me the most simple question. I gave him the most simple answer, one that I had been answering the same way for the past 10 years. He stood up, put his chair back, and WENT OFF. I'm sure there was pure disbelief on my face but my mind was rapping a Will Smith song....swallow your pride, don't let your lip react, you don't want to see my hand where my hip be at.....
He continued to rant for about two minutes when he made the most incredible statement. "I looked for that for four hours today!" Keep in mind his voice is loud and rising. If I wasn't already aware of his neurosis condition I would have sworn he was yelling at me, but I know better. Let me rephrase...HE KNOWS BETTER.
I asked him why he didn't come ask me this question when he first started his search and he responded by yelling and shaking his fist, "There is nothing I hate worse than asking for help!"
My previous look of disbelief was overtaken by a smile. A very large smile. Actually, it was probably a smirk that he wanted to slap the sh*t out. I then calmly stated, "You are such a man."
And as a man would do, he stood there and fed me a line of crap about how he intends to make my job easier.
I wanted to let him know that there is help available, whether it is in the form of a licensed professional or by simply asking me before wasting half his day on his ego.
Men....
Peace my peeps
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Changing The Drapes And Ripping Out The Carpet
Warning: This note may embarrass.
Drapes.....the hair on our head.
So many of us color our hair. I've been highlighting mine for years and recently decided I wanted to go back to my natural brown color. I had it changed back to brown a couple weeks ago and absolutely love it! I was very unsure at first because I've heard so much over the years how good highlights look on me. I have to say that I feel as if I look younger with just the brown color and have had just as many compliments in this short time as I did with my highlights. Shout out to Leslie, my beautician.
That is me changing the drapes. Now it's time to rip out my carpet.
Carpet....hair below the belt.
I've taken on an ideal that I can't write about the things I don't know anything about so I have to experience them first. The sad thing is, the things I actually know about....I can't write anyway due to who my readers are. But I will continue to push the envelope!
So many of my friends have had bikini waxes. I grew up in Florida so it was nothing to hear of girls having waxes to accommodate the cute swimsuits. I've never had one and never really thought of getting one. I figured I could manage trimming my own stuff.
That changed a couple of months ago when I decided I wanted a wax. Not just any wax, and not a bikini wax. If I was doing it, I was doing it big......a Brazilian Wax.
Let me save you from having to go Google it. It's the removal of all hair in the pelvic area, front and back.
Needless to say, it took me a bit to get up the nerve to even call and make an appointment. I hemmed and hawed for nearly two months. I asked around for places that would do this type of thing. In my mind it was wealthy, skinny women who had this procedure done. Some of my friends were joking, telling me it was probably more common in the stripper community. Well, I do like to be naked.....
I had to mentally prepare for this moment. I was a nervous wreck all week, anxious in a scary and excited way. I couldn't get out of mind what would happen to me and what positions I might be put in in order for this waxing to be successful. I read about it online and the common denominator was pain. I even read that you should take a couple Advil prior to the procedure. I was thinking I may want a pretty stiff drink before going in but I couldn't do that and drive myself there. My only logical solution to dealing with the pain was my iPod and a mouthpiece.
I made sure I had soothing music on my iPod and went to WalMart to buy a football mouthpiece to bite into once the ripping of carpet commenced. You laugh.... but I did. I even put it in boiling water for 30 seconds as was stated in the instructions and then placed it in my mouth to form to my own bite. I had a feeling I was going to be doing some serious biting.
Well, Friday finally presented itself. I gathered my personal comfort items and headed to the office. I wasn't there two or three minutes when my aesthetician angel took me in. Jeanette. How could anyone so sweet cause anyone pain?
I was sweating like a whore in church. I told Jeanette that I was doing this so that I could write about it as an experience. Of course I did want to do it to satisfy my own curiosity, too. I told her how you guys enjoy reading my short little notes and that I was going to share it with you. She thought that was great.
Time for business.....She told me to go ahead and get undressed and pointed out where my rear needed to be on the table. You laugh but it's no big deal to me. It's not the first time I've been naked in front of a woman. Heck, my gynecologist is a woman.
Anyway, it wasn't long and I felt the warm wax being smeared on my pelvic area. We were just chatting away like it was nothing and the next thing you know.....RIP!
It didn't even hurt! I don't want to say I was disappointed, but I felt like a complete moron for all the worrying I did. My eyebrow waxing hurts worse than this!!
Well, I just kept chatting and she kept ripping. She would tell me to move my legs in certain positions and I would, but not once was I put in one of the compromising positions I had imagined over and over in my worries. She was wonderful....almost therapeutic. We talked about marriage, kids, parents, religion, cussing, etc. I could have talked to her all day but there was only so much to rip out. I felt like we were instant friends. Of course, she might have been longing for me to shut up, but I just felt very comfortable with her.
"All done." I couldn't believe it! In no time we were done with my first Brazilian wax and I never felt the first bit of pain. Jeanette asked if I wanted to see and handed me a mirror. "Look at your bald kitty."
Wow! I touched it and it was as soft and smooth as a baby's bottom. I've never felt so free!
This is the perfect look for an "experience" I have planned later in the summer.
I have had a permanent grin on my face since the moment I walked out of that office. I feel as if I am gliding when I walk and I can't hardly wait to have another one done!
I strongly recommend this to any of you who are interested, and for those in/around Nashville, let me know and I will give you the info to get an appointment with Jeanette.
I need to give a shout out to my aesthetician, Jeanette. She was perfect! She made me feel so comfortable and at ease that I never needed to break out my iPod, and made me completely forget about needing something to redistribute the previously imagined pain (my mouthpiece).
Peace my peeps
Drapes.....the hair on our head.
So many of us color our hair. I've been highlighting mine for years and recently decided I wanted to go back to my natural brown color. I had it changed back to brown a couple weeks ago and absolutely love it! I was very unsure at first because I've heard so much over the years how good highlights look on me. I have to say that I feel as if I look younger with just the brown color and have had just as many compliments in this short time as I did with my highlights. Shout out to Leslie, my beautician.
That is me changing the drapes. Now it's time to rip out my carpet.
Carpet....hair below the belt.
I've taken on an ideal that I can't write about the things I don't know anything about so I have to experience them first. The sad thing is, the things I actually know about....I can't write anyway due to who my readers are. But I will continue to push the envelope!
So many of my friends have had bikini waxes. I grew up in Florida so it was nothing to hear of girls having waxes to accommodate the cute swimsuits. I've never had one and never really thought of getting one. I figured I could manage trimming my own stuff.
That changed a couple of months ago when I decided I wanted a wax. Not just any wax, and not a bikini wax. If I was doing it, I was doing it big......a Brazilian Wax.
Let me save you from having to go Google it. It's the removal of all hair in the pelvic area, front and back.
Needless to say, it took me a bit to get up the nerve to even call and make an appointment. I hemmed and hawed for nearly two months. I asked around for places that would do this type of thing. In my mind it was wealthy, skinny women who had this procedure done. Some of my friends were joking, telling me it was probably more common in the stripper community. Well, I do like to be naked.....
I had to mentally prepare for this moment. I was a nervous wreck all week, anxious in a scary and excited way. I couldn't get out of mind what would happen to me and what positions I might be put in in order for this waxing to be successful. I read about it online and the common denominator was pain. I even read that you should take a couple Advil prior to the procedure. I was thinking I may want a pretty stiff drink before going in but I couldn't do that and drive myself there. My only logical solution to dealing with the pain was my iPod and a mouthpiece.
I made sure I had soothing music on my iPod and went to WalMart to buy a football mouthpiece to bite into once the ripping of carpet commenced. You laugh.... but I did. I even put it in boiling water for 30 seconds as was stated in the instructions and then placed it in my mouth to form to my own bite. I had a feeling I was going to be doing some serious biting.
Well, Friday finally presented itself. I gathered my personal comfort items and headed to the office. I wasn't there two or three minutes when my aesthetician angel took me in. Jeanette. How could anyone so sweet cause anyone pain?
I was sweating like a whore in church. I told Jeanette that I was doing this so that I could write about it as an experience. Of course I did want to do it to satisfy my own curiosity, too. I told her how you guys enjoy reading my short little notes and that I was going to share it with you. She thought that was great.
Time for business.....She told me to go ahead and get undressed and pointed out where my rear needed to be on the table. You laugh but it's no big deal to me. It's not the first time I've been naked in front of a woman. Heck, my gynecologist is a woman.
Anyway, it wasn't long and I felt the warm wax being smeared on my pelvic area. We were just chatting away like it was nothing and the next thing you know.....RIP!
It didn't even hurt! I don't want to say I was disappointed, but I felt like a complete moron for all the worrying I did. My eyebrow waxing hurts worse than this!!
Well, I just kept chatting and she kept ripping. She would tell me to move my legs in certain positions and I would, but not once was I put in one of the compromising positions I had imagined over and over in my worries. She was wonderful....almost therapeutic. We talked about marriage, kids, parents, religion, cussing, etc. I could have talked to her all day but there was only so much to rip out. I felt like we were instant friends. Of course, she might have been longing for me to shut up, but I just felt very comfortable with her.
"All done." I couldn't believe it! In no time we were done with my first Brazilian wax and I never felt the first bit of pain. Jeanette asked if I wanted to see and handed me a mirror. "Look at your bald kitty."
Wow! I touched it and it was as soft and smooth as a baby's bottom. I've never felt so free!
This is the perfect look for an "experience" I have planned later in the summer.
I have had a permanent grin on my face since the moment I walked out of that office. I feel as if I am gliding when I walk and I can't hardly wait to have another one done!
I strongly recommend this to any of you who are interested, and for those in/around Nashville, let me know and I will give you the info to get an appointment with Jeanette.
I need to give a shout out to my aesthetician, Jeanette. She was perfect! She made me feel so comfortable and at ease that I never needed to break out my iPod, and made me completely forget about needing something to redistribute the previously imagined pain (my mouthpiece).
Peace my peeps
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